My music

my complete transformation

My music career has completely transformed over the years. I have to admit, I am completely pleased with the level of success I have experienced.

I have built a pretty decent music catalog. I have seen my music grow from responding to a dare from one of the artists I was managing at the time. To see my music, explode on an international platform. The last time we kept track, our music had been released on the radio, in films, and had played in more than 21 countries such as Argentina, Canada, Germany, Italy, London, Japan, Mexico, Peru, United States, etc.

Although I love music and I did find a level of release and enjoyment in writing music. I never saw it as a career path for me. I did not truly see the music industry as a good fit for me. I certainly did not imagine the level of success for myself as I have experienced. At one time I had major record labels like Def Jam Recordings and Virgin Records pursuing me to submit some of my music to their labels. He does not know that I know this, but even 50 Cent took a serious look at my music when Ace Reign, Kruixfy, and Lacy B recorded my rap/R&B track – Love Conspiracy. Okay, yea, that track is popping. It really expanded my music to many different international markets. And I had a lot to get off of my chest with that one. I’m just saying. 
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Fans expressing the interest and love for my music

As I said before, my problem was, that I could not see myself building a career in the music industry. Well, not as of yet.

Despite my reluctance, for years, I continue to write songs for other artists in the Country, Hip Hop Rap, and R&B genres. And I was starting to expand out into other categories. Plus, I was making some money off of my singles. And to this day, I am still collecting some royalties.

But for a long time, I really did not know what I wanted to do with this newly discovered gift I had. But everything changed in 2014. About two years after Felicia and I met. Somehow, Felicia discovered that I wrote music and had some tracks out there that were having some success. She started asking me a lot of questions about it and I really was trying to avoid the conversation. It was not that I was trying to keep that part of my life a secret. I just did not take my songwriting career seriously despite my level of success. To me, it was a hobble. A hustle. A way to bring in a little extra cash. I just did not see the true value of my writing ability or any value of establishing a real songwriting career.

But then Felicia did something I completely was not prepared for. She pulled out a suitcase of songs she had written since the early part of her childhood. I was completely overwhelmed by the number of songs she had written. So, I pulled a few out and skim-read a few lines of several songs. THEY WERE REALLY GOOD. I MEAN REALLY GOOD. But I wasn’t sure how each song I pulled out sounded. So, I pulled out a song and asked her, “sing this.” And when she sang it, I was flabbergasted. So, I pulled out another and another and another. And each time she sang each song, I could not believe what I was hearing. They were so perfectly written and beautiful and emotionally moving. And I couldn’t believe these songs were just sitting in her dirty old suitcase. There was no way I could continue to let these well-written songs sit in this suitcase and nothing is done with them. 

​And that was my turning point. The point when I start to look at a music career differently. I started to explore the possibilities. But initially, Felicia and I were heading in the wrong direction – mostly my fault. (Compare to Matthew 18:19-20; Amos 3:3; Colossians 3:7; 1 Corinthians 1:10). This created a lot of clashes and friction between what I wanted to write and what I was comfortable writing about and what Felicia desired to write about. 

the clash of the titans 
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The day finally came when we reenacted the scenes from the movie, The Clash Of The Titans as it related to our preferred styles of writing music. All I knew at the time was Hip Hop/Rap, Country, and R&B. But more than 98 percent of Felicia’s suitcase full of music was Gospel, Worship, and Christian style of music. Something, I knew nothing about. At the time, I really was not exposed to any Christian, Gospel, or Worship music that she was familiar with. All I was acquainted with was that old Gospel hymn music with that old organ sound that I hated. So, I had not listened to any Gospel songs since my childhood, and that was only when I was in Church.

So, before Felicia and I ever get started good, it appeared our music ambitions were not going anywhere. But she did agree to write one Country song with me called No Other Love.

We produced it with Nashville Song Services and that track did really well as well. We both won quite of few songwriting competitions with that track. And I accomplished at the time what I wanted to achieve with Felicia. I wanted to build her confidence and exposed her to other options than what she had written in the past.

But even with the success of that track, Felicia lost interest, which left me snatching my head. But then she showed me an album of songs that she had already written called Total Access. 
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Felicia's original album Total Access and singles that will appear on the is album. She has graciously allowed me to add a few of my new Gospel singles to it. This album has not been recorded or released as of yet. We are waiting on GOD to pair us with the right recording artists, musicians, and music producer.

Out of all the songs I had seen in her suitcase, I did not hear any of these tracks. So, I asked her to sing them. And once again I was dumbfounded and amazed by how really good all these songs were. I really like every one of them. And I realized she had given much thought to her lyrics, the production of her lyrics and the music composition, and the recording of each one of her tracks. And at that time, I had not. So, this album of hers, began my journey of self-examining myself from a musical standpoint and what did I really want to do if I wanted to help get Felicia’s music out there? What was I willing to give up as well as contribute? It took some time, but this journey with Felicia really helped to transform me and changed my mind set and outlook toward music. How I saw it. What do I want to write about? And how do I want my music to be portrayed by others? 

my change in musICal direction
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But my real change did not take place until about 8 years ago – in late 2014. I was driving to work and I really hated my job and my crazy boss. I really did not want to go there. I just wanted to turn around and go home or find something different to do. Plus, I had not been too long out of a homosexual relationship. So, my hormones were off the chain as well. So, I was physically and emotionally unstable and really frustrated with my job.

At the time, all I could say, as I was pleading with God – attempting to pray for help, was GOD. GOD! GOD!! As tears started to stream down my face, I heard myself sing. 
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​What’s next Lord
Don’t you hear me crying out
Burdens are heavy
Don’t have the strength to call out….
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As I was driving, I immediately grabbed a pen and a piece of paper. And right there, as I was driving to work, I wrote my first Gospel/Christian song called I Need You. I wrote the entire song right there in my car. Now, of course, in this post. I am purposely leaving some of the lines and words out of the track but….

​… On my knees, I’m reaching up
Bowing down to worship, but I….
I need you to grab hold….
I need you to quench my soul….
I need you to free me from….

Oh, my goodness, it is such an emotional, charging, refreshing, beautiful, and well-written song. 
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The transformation 
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It was then that I knew that it wasn’t Felicia that needed to be more open. But it was me. I needed to narrow down my focus and make some different decisions. If I was going to do this music thing, I need to pick a specific genre and stick with it. That was the only way I really was going to create my own brand/style and get really good at this art of writing music. But I also knew, Felicia was not going to be interested in writing any other genre but Gospel and or Christian music. So, either I need to move in the same direction she was heading. Or, just put on the brakes and give this up right now, before I waste my time and hers.

So, I prayed about it and 3 more songs came out of my belly. I even had one dream where I was in heaven and I heard an entire song that I actually wrote down later in the middle of the night called Glorious LIGHT. Since then, I have written enough Gospel/Christian tracks to produce at least 3 albums if not more. I finally knew what GOD was calling me to do with my songwriting abilities. 
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1. To write for other artists
2. To start a Gospel/Christian record label with Felicia in the South Carolina region
3. To commit my music and songwriting abilities to the LORD by writing music for and about HIM and only HIM and HIS kingdom

Some of the titles of my upcoming Christian/Gospel tracks

significance of my music today
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And today, since 2020, I have completely committed myself to writing music for the LORD ONLY. I am more confident in my songwriting abilities and know that I know that I am called to this along with many other giftings and talents, and natural abilities the LORD has anointed and gifted me with.

The only missing piece, that is in Felicia and my future is the right music producer and recording artists to record and produce our music. Over the years, we have been matched up with some very talented and professional recording artists and two great and talented music producers. But to me, SOMETHING was always off – it wasn’t JUST RIGHT. Not the perfect fit I know GOD wanted for us.

Then Felicia and I realized three things. 
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1. We were not in a season of harvesting for our music but building. Therefore, we were in a season where we needed to make some definite decisions about Felicia’s music – the music she had already written and the ones she will write. And the music I was beginning to write.

2. Because we were in a season of building – writing and creating more new music and organizing others. It was not GOD’s timing to match us with the right recording artists and music producers. WE WERE TRYING TO FORCE SOMETHING IN A SEASON THAT WAS NOT THE TIMING FOR IT.

3. And Felicia and I needed time to grow and respect each other’s craft; writing styles; management methods and skills; our natural writing and production abilities; and learn to work well with each other before we can bring others in that would help to further develop our music and musical talents.  ​
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​GOD IS CERTAINLY GOOD, WISE, AND PATIENT. And HE knows how to transform the heart and minds of people and get you heading in the right direction. (Compare to 2 Corinthians 5:17).